So, I think we can all agree that I’m no pro at the Vidja Games.

I just finished Diablo III for the first time. EASY. Holy easy. The hardest part was when I stopped playing for two months, only to come back and have no idea what was going on, so I ran around a desert forest for 6 hours because I didn’t know where I was supposed to be.

I honestly didn’t even really try, because I figured that this was the first run through, so whatever if I make a total mess of things. I wore underrated armor, didn’t bother mucking with my skills, and ran right under massive monsters. I think I died maybe 4 times, and that’s only because I didn’t realise you could heal yourself. It was fun, but towards the end it was just a case of hold the right mouse button down over the bad guy until it died. Even Diablo himself was easy.

Best part? When I got the Butcher’s cleaver and ran around making Pudge sounds. Second best part? When I got a second cleaver, and gave it to my enchantress buddy and we BOTH made Pudge sounds. Third best part? When I got a super dagger that made me squeal like ze piggy. FANTASTIC.

Worst part: Wondering when it was going to get harder. And the 6-hour aimless forest-desert (it was a desert that segued into a forest. IDK?)